Genesis 5 and 6

Genesis 5 is a genealogy complete with ages. It's from this that Young Earth Creationists get their age of the Earth.

Adam was 130 when Seth was born who was 105 when Enosh was born who was 90 when Kenan was born who was... You get the idea. This leads down to Noah who was 500 when his three sons were born. (Does this mean that Shem, Ham, and Japheth were triplets?)

I sat down and worked out how old the earth was when they were born. It was 1,556 years old.

Chapter 6 starts with an explanation of the Nephilim. If you're following along with a KJV, it starts with the "There were giants in those days." thing. We're not quite sure what the Nephilim are and they don't show up in Canon again. If you've managed to track down the Book of Enoch (who showed up last chapter as "The whole lifetime of Enoch was three hundred and sixty-five years. Then Enoch walked with God, and he was no longer here, for God took him." No, this isn't Cain's son.) the Nephilim show up as what caused Lucifer's Fall from Grace. The "sons of God", whatever that means, came down to Earth, boffed a bunch of women and, the result of this is the Nephilim. Enoch says that they were thrown out of Heaven for this, but it's not Canon so it doesn't count, I guess.

Anyway, there's a whole bunch of wickedness on the Earth and God doesn't like it. In fact, he doesn't like it so darn much he decides to drown the planet and try again. I guess God runs Windows. ERROR! Reboot!

God looks down, sees Noah and decides to let him live. So he tells Noah to make "an ark of gopherwood" (What's gopherwood? We don't know. This is the only time it shows up.) and gives him the dimensions. The ark, by the way, looks like a rectangular box. It does not look like a ship. Noah's allowed to take himself, his wife, his sons, and their wives onto the ark and he's told that a male and female of all animals is to come aboard and he's also to get all the food he needs.

Thus does Chapter 6 end.

Young Earth Creationists have done whole feasibility studies on the ark. Unfortunately, I don't happen to own any of them so I'm not going to get into the evolutionary debate here.

Genesis 4

Yeah, it's been a month because I was busy getting back into school. Accountancy here I come!

I was going to start this off with a UFC joke but that's probably been done to death.

Genesis 4 is all about Cain and Able. If you got this story from playing Vampire: The Masquerade you will be a touch surprised reading this chapter.

Cain's a farmer and Able's a shepherd. They both make sacrifices to God. God likes Able's more then Cain's. This pisses Cain off. We are given no reason as to why God like's Able's sacrifice more than Cain's. God talks to Cain about it but really isn't helpful. "If you do well, you can hold up your head; but if not, sin is a demon lurking the door; his urge is toward you, yet you can be his master." Thanks, God! That totally explains why Cain's sacrifice didn't count!

Cain kills Able. Again, we don't know why but it's implied that it's because of the sacrifices. God shows up again and we get the "Am I my brother's keeper?" quote. God curses Cain (Think, for a sec. There are four people on earth. Cain killed one. He's the worst mass murderer ever.) and Cain's response is that this curse is horrible 'cause anyone who sees him can kill him. God says no, I'll put a mark on you so that "Cain shall be avenged sevenfold."

Cain takes a wife (presumably from his unnamed sisters) and goes off to found the first city in the land of Nod, Enoch, named after his son.

...The first murderer goes off to found the first city. So, way way back, cites were places of sin and vice and yuck. And we wonder where we get the ideals that rural life is better than city life and rural morals are somehow different from city morals. It goes back to this.

Anyhow, there's a brief genealogy of Cain's kids including some of my favorites. Jabal, the ancestor of all who dwell in tents and keep cattle; Jubal, the ancestor of all who play the lyre and the pipe; Tubalcain, the ancestor of all who forge instruments of bronze and iron (My greatgrandfather was a blacksmith. Does that mean I'm a descendant of Cain?).

Interestingly, back in the middle ages vampires and monsters and spooky things were thought to bear the Mark of Cain. I'm getting this specifically from my Heaney translation of Beowulf. "Grendel was the name of this grim demon
haunting the marches, marauding round the heath
and the desolate fens; he had dwelt for a time
in misery among the banished monsters,
Cain's clan, whom the Creator had outlawed
and condemned as outcasts. For the killing of Abel
the Eternal Lord had exacted a price;
Cain got no good from committing that murder
because the Almighty made him anathema,
and out of the curse of his exile there sprang
ogres and elves and evil phantoms
and the giants too who strove with God
time and again until He gave them their reward."
I could hunt down my copy of Beowulf that has the original Anglo-Saxon but I get the feeling that would only interest someone like me.

...Don't ask my how those that bear the Marks of Cain survived the flood. I've never gotten that answered.


Adam and Eve get it on again and Seth, our parent is born and has a kid, Enosh.

Anyhow. This chapter ends with "At that time, men began to invoke the Lord by name." This will become important next chapter.